You know I’m pretty easy going and accommodating to all of my clients.
However, there have been more than a few times when I should have said “adios” due to the stress level involved with conflict resolution of believe it or not- a GUESTZILLA!
That’s right pal, the general public assumes only the bride misbehaves with preposterous demands- this is absolutely inaccurate.
In fact, the worst offenders are usually not even in the wedding party I’m afraid.
I remember a wedding where the grandmother in law acted like such an idiot that nearly two hundred people were sorry she didn’t stay at home and spare us all her acid tongue and childish behavior towards the other in laws who behaved appropriately and, civilly towards one another while the wedding videographer caught her kicking the chairs in front of her belonging to her ex daughter in law (Mother of the Groom) on film! That’s right, the wedding video gives a complete and accurate scenario of the incredible stupidity displayed by this disruptive guest on film for not only the bridal couple to forever remember but also, the other guests.
When you think no one is watching at a wedding- think again!
Then there was the wedding where I was floored that the mother went in to the brides dressing room to start an argument ten minutes before the wedding and created such an uproar that we had to wait nearly 45 minutes for her make up to be repaired.
Now, I’m accustomed to a normal bump in the rainbow during wedding ceremonies when emotions run high. Isn’t everyone when they are aware ahead of time that so and so can’t stand so and so?
Don’t we expect someone or something to explode similar to the Hatfields and the McCoys with their bottled up their hostility getting to a fevered pitch while they saddle up the horses and jump in their stagecoach to head on over to an otherwise beautiful and important to everyone else ceremony?
You probably had already heard from someone else that a showdown was being pre planned and groaned a sigh of pity for the couple just like me!
The thing is, the wedding isn’t about the person acting like a maniacal imbecile, It’s about the couple, the wedding party and the friends who are honored to be a part of their day.
Over the past year I’ve had the bride that was over an hour and a half late to her own wedding and, lied about bring affiliated with a police organization to receive a discount on services she was never entitled to. Yes, it’s on TV. Hot Bench episode “Don’t call me Bridezilla.” You see, I sued her for theft of services.
Then, I had the pleasure of yet another bride who refused to walk the aisle until another hairdresser arrived on the scene- she wasn’t happy with her updo.
Yet another bride showed up so intoxicated- she was unable to walk the aisle without assistance after attending her bachelorette party the night before.
I’m patient and perseverant in my efforts to attain peace during such mentally exhausting episodes, however, I’m not a miracle worker. Working with the public can be a thankless or joyful reality for all of us with just a tiny bit of consideration and respect for the couple and the wedding party- whether you get along with everyone-OR NOT! Check your attitude in the parking lot and realize the reason you were invited was to be a part of an important milestone and most assuredly was not intended for you to disrupt the event.
I’ve added a clause that expressly and clearly states that should there be insurmountable conflict that I cannot overcome, the fee is double or, find someone else to conduct your ceremony. As of late, these broom riding fun busters are taking the joy out of my job!
For those of you who are guilty of “stirring the chili” at these events, do all of us a favor-don’t attend! Stay home and keep your opinions to yourself.
By the way, every guest has a cell phone and ears. What you think no one can see or hear is a misconception.
In fact, you might just see or hear yourself on social media and, wish you had conducted yourself properly, well after the fact!
The reason I do not and never will ask if anyone objects is simple. I refuse to have a guest, in law or out law ruin a wedding or other ceremony with their opinion and, have no plans to open a window and give rise to an opportunity to disrupt the day.
The best advice is, if you have reservations about the union, ask yourself why you came? I am.
Comments by Wendy Wortham