Today while at the emergency room with one of our Little Pawners, Maryssa Mahaney who had stepped on a rusty nail while walking Foxy Wortham asked me how my twin and I have so many followers on Twitter, Instagram & FB.
The answer is more complicated to explain to a 12 year old mainly because they don’t understand the time it takes to engage with your connections by retweeting, liking or sharing their posts in order to have them like, retweet and follow your posts. I’ve said it before but it bears repeating- if you aren’t engaging with your connections, you aren’t “working” your social media correctly. Followers aren’t easy when they are genuine meaning you didn’t buy them but you earned their follow.While waiting on her tetnus shot, Maryssa told me that my sister and I “play on our phones all of the time.” I explained that we aren’t really “playing” on our phones since we have no interest in games but, we share, like and retweet our connections for a minimum of 3 hours a day to “effectively earn” their follow.
It takes time to screen followers on all of our accounts prior to following them because inappropriate content followers are blocked. What is “inappropriate?” Porn, nudity, hateful posts, discrimination and other “controversial” posts or rants. My Twitter account @Texastwins2 took years to reach over 30k followers and certainly wasn’t something that happened overnight.
Keeping a 12 year old entertained by showing her how I screen a follower gave her insight on who I block or who I follow back based on their media and postings. Maryssa told me that she loves her Musically app which I know nothing about but “sometimes people say mean things like my eyelids are too big or my face isn’t on key.” I found this disturbing and since our twins are social butterfly’s and often googled- told her that not everyone is always nice and maybe she should stop using her app. She explained that she has over 1000 followers and loves to watch her friends videos so why let 1 or 2 mean people ruin something she enjoys? Sometimes a 12 year old can make sense of a situation by weighing the joys and/or sorrows of social media.
Maryssa and Makenna are both on FB and Instagram but not too keen on Twitter. They share many of our twin friends and we follow their posts along with our friends. FB was their very first dive into social media and since all of us enjoy looking at twin photos, something we often do as a TwinTeam.
As we discussed how painful the tetnus shot would be, I explained the importance of getting it although I’m not certain anything that I would’ve said might have had her begging to get the shot. Years ago, I was working at Texas Patios and stepped on a rusty nail. Not wanting to leave work- I trudged on for another six hours and finished my shift but when I attempted to use my right foot to drive my car, the pain shot up into my hip. I called my twin to come drive me to the hospital and learned that a cellulitis infection had set into my muscles and would be unable to walk for nearly 6 months because I had waited to seek medical help. For years we’ve all heard about the dangers of a rusty nail but maybe thought it to be an old wives tail. What actually causes the infection (as explained by the ER Doctor) is the dirt that is pushed into your bloodstream by the nail and the reason you need a shot is to prevent tetnus which leads to lockjaw and other debilitating health issues which occasionally include death. I’ve never met a child who “wanted” a shot and Maryssa was no exception but sometimes we have to make tough decisions in the best interest of children, grandchildren and even my grandnieces.Last week Cindy and I took the twins to their annual physical appointments and were told the girls needed HPV vaccinations. Since the twins aren’t sexually active- we questioned the need for this vaccine and were told even though they aren’t this vaccine prevents cancer. As a parent, grandparent or great aunt, we decided to trust the pediatrician.
Many families are choosing to opt out of vaccinations for their children and attending school with the twins. We vaccinate them in order to protect them from other children who do not get vaccinated.
As a pet owner, I take Foxy Wortham every six months to get all of his shots because there are dogs in my neighborhood who don’t have shots and wild cats running around. I’m fairly certain Foxy isn’t too keen on these shots either but at his age we can’t afford for him to get kennel cough or something worse by going unprotected.
Maryssa had “checked in” at Harris Hospital on FB an told me that social media helps her feel connected to her friends even if a few of them she’s never met. Their replies to her post calmed her down enough for the shot and she was given a prescription for antibiotics.
How “connected” you are with your followers and friends is up to you. Social media like many other things in life takes effort on your part by interacting.As we finally get ready to go to bed late tonight, Maryssa hops on FB and tells all of her FB friends she’s feeling better and appreciates their good wishes and positive thoughts along with “you guys always make me feel like you’re right here with me in my good times and even the bad ones- thanks friends and have a great night!”
Teaching all of our children and grandchildren to be compassionate to others and thankful for kindness is perhaps one of the best lessons in life we’ve given them. Although there will always be one or two bad apples out there who choose to cyber bully, they cannot and will not change the connection to social media that gives us friends from around the world. We enjoy their posts, their pictures and their shares. We rejoice with them and we pray for them in times of bad health or sorrow.
A friend of our family had tragedy strike last week when his sister’s home literally blew up from a propane explosion. With three small children, she will need help getting her children new school supplies and clothing along with a place to live. We will be creating a gofundme account for the Martinez family and having a bake sale to help them get back on their feet.
Maryssa and Makenna told their teacher this week that they spent their summer helping over 62 families enjoy a wedding, estate sale, birthday party, baby shower and even fundraising to help families that came to The Pawning Planners or Texas Twins Events because they had little or no money for an event or friends or family to help them. Their teacher asked if they enjoyed working at weddings and events. Both girls replied “you bet we love helping these families and meeting new friends. Some of our school friends go on vacation but we know that helping others is important because it gives them hope and by showing them kindness they will help a stranger one day too.” They know this to be true because they’ve seen it happen time and time again with families we’ve helped in the past several years jumping in to help us with new clients. The joy of doing something special for someone no one else was going to help is seeing how they take that gift and recognize the beauty of selfless giving and volunteer their own time to help us in our unique business endeavor that gives anyone “regardless of their income- the opportunity for a Dream Event.”
With both of our Little Pawners branching into photography, they show no signs of slowing down by pitching in at events and our excited to help the Martinez Family by donating clothes and helping with the bake sale.
Since our family work and play together, we spend more time together too. But everyone (aside from my husband and brother in law) keep up to date by scrolling timelines, retweeting, reposting and sharing. The friends we’ve met along the way are a bonus to us that social media opened a window to the world outside we would have never opened and good or bad- social media isn’t going to go away because it’s here to stay.
Teaching your children compassion and selflessness isn’t easy in a world full of selfies and self involvement but, it’s something worth diving into. Volunteering and even visiting a nursing home or contributing in any small way to help those less fortunate is the best place to start…
Wendy M Wortham
Comments by Wendy Wortham